“People who shut their eyes to reality simply invite their own destruction, and anyone who insists on remaining in a state on innocence long after that innocence is dead turns himself into a monster.” #JamesBaldwin
If you’ve been plugged in to social media today, then you already know the news about R. Kelly: The award-winning, 50-year-old singer, songwriter and performer is again making headlines for more than just a tour. After years of rumor and decades of innuendo, and a trial in 2008, Kelly is now being scrutinized by law enforcement after accusations by parents that the R&B superstar is now isolating and abusing six young women, keeping them apart from their loved ones with manipulation and sequestering them in on-site, sex-driven cults.
In harrowing detail, credible news sources including Rolling Stone, Billboard and Business Insider have shared the testimony of peers and guardians alike, all of them recalling initially-innocent encounters with the Chicago-born superstar in their star-struck pursuit of an autograph, a photo or even help in securing a record deal. But apparently, in secret, Kelly maintained contact with the women and enticed them to leave their homes and schools. According to one report, three former members of Kelly’s entourage—-Asante McGee, Kitti Jones and Cheryl Mack—-confirmed to witnessing the women being held in private properties in Atlanta and Chicago; “They said six women live in properties rented by Kelly….dictating what they eat, how they dress, when they bathe, when they sleep, and how they engage in sexual encounters that he records.” One parent, despite her awareness of the infamous 2002 sex tape, the 2008 trial and the rumors plaguing him before and after the acquittal, characterized herself as having “always been an R. Kelly fan” and confident she and her husband could protect their then-17-year-old daughter “if I was with her.” But within a few months of reaching the age of consent, their now-19-year-old moved to be with Kelly and hasn’t seen her family since 2016.
What do each of the complainants have in common? All of the parents now regret entrusting the young women with the entertainer and were aware of, yet overlooked, R. Kelly’s alleged history of sexual deviancy. Reports have been filed and multiple agencies are investigating, but at this writing, none of the young women are cooperating. They’re claiming, according to family, to be with Kelly by choice.
As a parent myself and the mother of two daughters, these allegations are heartbreaking and horrific. I cannot imagine the pain their loved ones are going through, having awareness of what’s going on and desperate to get their daughters away from the self-proclaimed ‘Pied Piper of R&B.’ But I also must ask, as a woman and a mother, what were they thinking? They knew about his marriage to the late, under-aged Aaliyah, the ‘secret rooms’ in his home that even his former wife had no access to, that sex tape, the farce of a child pornography trial and Kelly’s public avoidance of anything resembling remorse.
So, with that knowledge and awareness on-deck, I only have one question left for the parents, his remaining inner circle and anyone else still claiming to be down for R. Kelly—–why? What is it about this talented, yet troubled man that makes his supporters deny the red flags, bells, whistles and alarms regarding his choices?
In my opinion, the reasoning, and consequences, are rooted in a race-conscious and misogynistic toxic mess. Somehow, apparently, his followers believe that a man who creates magic in the studio is simply incapable of such abhorrent acts. To them, it’s a larger conspiracy conceived by ‘wypipo’ and ‘fast-azz hussies/hoes/thots’ out to cash out and shut down one of R&B’s most prolific performers.
But by continuing to download his mp3s and attending his shows, rather than boycotting Kelly and holding him accountable, what do we gain? By enabling this proud pervert and even worse, providing him even fleeting contact with our girls and women, what are we teaching him and what are others learning about us, and our society in return?
Even if “Team Kelly” could supply some answers, what I do know is this: I haven’t dropped a dime in R. Kelly’s direction since 2002. I don’t follow him in social media and his music is out of rotation in our home. I enjoyed his music, saw him live a couple of times and for more his sake than ours, I wish the man would hit a therapist’s couch before picking up the mic again anytime soon. But in the meantime, the need to demonstrate morality to our children resonates more than ‘Kellz’’ catchy catalog.
Anybody else remember The Boondocks? Waaaaay back in 2005, during that infamous parody of an R. Kelly trial, Huey Freeman said it best; “We all know the n**** can sing, but what happened to standards? What happened to bare minimums? ……Don’t pretend the man is a hero! Act like you’ve got some [expletive]sense people! Damn!”
Because his fans chose not to take heed, neither did R. Kelly. And in the process, it’s getting harder and harder to tell which side is in the most need of help.
By Melody Charles